April 18, 2008 7:01 AM
A Tribute to Dr. Sears and Martha #2
As I announced last month, I'm gathering thank-yous from parents whose lives have been touched by Dr. and Martha Sears' books on attachment parenting, child development, and child discipline. I will be presenting them to Martha as a gift on May 1.
Greta sent this:
Dear Dr. and Mrs. Sears,
As I take a moment to sit down and try to put my feelings of gratitude into words, I can hardly believe that you will actually be reading this! Thank you for taking the time to read my letter, and thank you to Barbara (Momma C) for the opportunity to do so this side of heaven. It is a dream come true for me to be able to thank people who have helped me so much.
I was brought up in a loving, Christian family who strongly believed in imparting their values to their children. I was taught throughout my life that children are out to manipulate and control their parents. I was told that doing things like holding children a lot, responding to cries, responding at night etc were terrible. I don’t ever remember hearing that children are a blessing. I had a very soft heart, but I bought into these values, and for this and several other reasons, decided to never have children. Praise God, He changed my heart (this story is on Mommylife) and in 2005, my daughter, Anneke Grace was born. Her name means, favored grace, and grace, of course, means undeserved gift. Truer words were never spoken.
God, in His sovereignty, allowed me to go through a dark and difficult time after her birth. I experienced a 3 month postpartum depression. Looking back, I can see to a great extent why it happened. I had no help, I hit the ground running after her birth, became exhausted, and also had some terrible advice/interventions. One of the biggest problems, however, was that as soon as my daughter was born, I wanted to hold her, carry her, have her sleep beside me etc, but I KNEW this was wrong. I did it anyway, but worried that someone might find out.
Once my postpartum depression lifted, I went to the bookstore to look for some information and answers. God graciously led me to The Baby Book. I had never heard of you, nor attachment parenting, and I certainly didn’t know you were Christians!
I read that book from cover to cover, as if my life depended on it. I think, in a way, it actually did. As I read, my mouth literally hung open with joy and surprise. How can I describe the feeling of chains falling away? Not only was I ALLOWED to feel the way I was feeling and do what I was doing, but it was BEST for my daughter too!!! My whole world shifted, and confidence and joy returned to my life.
How could I thank the people whom God used to bring about this change in my heart and life? Words fail me. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
After that, I quickly bought and read, The Discipline Book, The Successful Child and The Healthiest Kid in The Neighborhood. Each one has become a prized possession.
Your books gave me confidence to never give up on my dream of breastfeeding my daughter. Because of bad advice and interventions, I ended up pumping all of her breast milk. Well, when she was 6 months old, I decided to try to breastfeed her. It took about 3 days, but we did it! After so much heartache, God answered my prayers and brought so much joy!! She is now 25 months old and is weaning herself.
We are expecting our second baby in about 3 weeks now. He has been diagnosed with a cleft lip, and possibly a palate too. I am so thankful that I now have the tools to give him the best start possible, and that I have tools to help myself too. I won’t make the same mistakes that I made the first time, many of which led to my postpartum depression.
I found The Complete Book of Christian Parenting and Child Care about 2 weeks ago, and as usual, read it from cover to cover immediately. My husband is reading it now. It is wonderful. At first I was tempted to feel terrible that I didn’t have it long ago, but I cling to God’s perfect timing. He knew I needed it before our son was born, and I’m trusting Him for that.
I’m just at the beginning of my Mothering story, but I am deeply and profoundly grateful to you both. You and Momma C have changed the direction of my life, and thus, the lives of my children. This is a debt I could never repay, and so I offer you my most humble and heartfelt, “Thank you”!
With Love,
Greta Alex
If you would like to join in in expressing your appreciation to the Sears, you can blog it and add your link below. Or email to me for publication here, like Greta's and Yvonne's. I will gather up whatever comes in to surprise Martha Sears on May 1.
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Comments
I'm so sorry I missed the deadline, I have been practicing attachment parenting for 15 years, and would have loved an opportunity to thank Dr. and Mrs. Sears. I have parts of their books memorized, especially the passages where they describe parenting Stephen, their son with Down syndrome. It was the only book available to me when my daughter with DS was born, and their loving attitude was a big help to me. Hey, Barbara, how about teaming up with the Sears to write a parenting book about Down syndrome?!
Posted by: Leticia Velasquez | April 27, 2008 10:44 AM
